My Fair Babes
What’s a dreamer without her Dream Babes?
November 30, 2013 | Cake | December 2013
Someday someone will stand by me. I am a 21-year old dreamer, a doe, a wanderer ‘til the end; true love will find me in the end (Daniel Johnston taught me that). My heart is an imaginarium, which fuels an ongoing lust over dreamboat celebrities. I might not have One Direction posters or a subscription to J14, but I am a fangirl nonetheless. At this point in my life it feels right to be a fangirl. Fate to me is realizing the unexpected is meant to be. Jay Baruchel, Seth MacFarlane and Russell Brand are my dream babes. I don’t expect to end up with my dream babes, but truthfully, I will never regret my love for them. I will never forget them.
Jay Baruchel is a Canadian sweetheart and intellectual actor/film maker. He has starred in various works including Fanboys, This Is the End, She’s Out of my League, Goon, The Trotsky, Tropic Thunder, and Undeclared. I have Jay Baruchel to thank for making me truly love Canada. For the longest time I felt like I needed to live in America to be someone. I convinced myself that I had to live in the land of dreams for my dreams to come true. It wasn’t until I stumbled upon his interviews after first watching his film The Trotsky that I had a moment of clarity, finally, someone who actually understood the Canadian crisis I was having.
Jay Baruchel is more than a babe to me, but I guess he inspires me to feel strongly as well about making art in Canada. There are many Canadian actors and successful Canadians but as mentioned by Jay Baruchel in various interviews, “Many Canadian actors tend to only come to Canada when the work dries up in the states. It’s a terrible truth.” When you think about it the media doesn’t spotlight many Canadian enthusiasts. There aren’t many Canadians like Jay proudly having a maple leaf tattooed above their heart. I think more people need to crush on Canada. It’s sweet as maple syrup, and when things get bad you can always bundle up in a warm coat and blanket and observe the beautiful landscape.
Seth is an important figure in my life, even without me knowing at times. Fate has a funny way of shaping your life. Family Guy is one of my favorite shows. I’ve actually been watching the show for so long that the characters seem real to me. I might sound corny, but the Griffin family, in a way, feels like my multiverse family.
Growing up on Seth’s show was a gift. After school, or after work it was a comforting program to laugh along to. The world just seemed better after watching an episode (and still does). To be very honest I knew little about Seth for the longest time. Now, I squirm and blush when I read his name in the openings credits to Family Guy or American Dad. Oddly his hosting gig at the 85th Academy Awards is what made me acknowledge him. I don’t really support or favor some of the jokes he made at The Oscars but everything clicked for me that night. Any fangirl or fanboy will agree that infatuation is hard to explain. No reason is really needed, but for article sake I guess I’ll try and piece it all together.
When I saw Seth for the first time (at The Oscars) memories of watching Family Guy and drawing Stewie Griffin in art class drifted into thought. I guess I felt infinite and happy when I realized who he really was. After the show I researched for a week everything about him (like any fangirl would do). I discovered we both love My Fair Lady, All in the Family, the book Flatland: A Romance of Many Dimensions, drawing, Star Trek, musicals, and we both have very retro tastes.
Russell Brand has had a spiritual effect on me. My spirituality is a bit bizarre as I wasn’t brought up with religion. “Well I don’t believe in God, but I’m also not an Atheist. Because the universe is chaos, but chaos picks favorites.” My favorite folk punk singer Pat the Bunny sang this in his Wingnut Dishwashers song “Jesus Does the Dishes”. I pray a lot but I’m not really sure who I pray to.
In August I went to Russell’s worldwide Messiah Complex tour. The event was very moving and will forever be locked into my memory like a time capsule. The doors read “No recording devices. Live in the moment.” The whole show had this weird way of combining lust, celebrity, politics, and religion into a glorious combination. Live, Russell Brand is energetic, tall, resembles Jesus, and has a flirty charisma. He stepped into the audience and I was too late to stand up to meet him but perhaps it’s for the best. Pre-show I would have done anything to meet him but my clumsy lack of time resulted in an odd gift. It gave me the joy of being a dreamer. When you meet a crush or celebrity things alter when you meet them. It’s like the appeal diminishes.
Fame is an abstract idea that certain humans are more important than others. Humans are curious creatures. It’s only natural for us to want to know about mysterious, beautiful, and famous beings. Time is a fickle measurement, and so is fame and yet we need the two to maintain society. Russell has taught me to question celebrity and my spirituality. Countless times I stayed up watching his intriguing interviews, and swooning over his looks and sense of humour. All my dream babes inspire me to change. I hate the expression “you’ve changed.” People don’t magically alter form (unless you are a wizard) but people do change looks, ideas, values, jobs, religion, diet, and relationships. If we didn’t change we would be dead.
My teenage self would be quick to say “I’m a fangirl, because I’m a fangirl.” Fandoms exist in everyone and everything. It’s inevitable. It’s a sensation that’s impossible to describe. Through adulthood I have found a way to channel this into art. I think the reason why I’m still drawn to dream babes is because I prefer to romanticize the unattainable, because it’s pretty hard for me to crush on actual people. It would be hard for me to pull a Helga from Hey Arnold! and make shrines and crafts for someone I know in real life. I’ve never been on a date or kissed or anything, I guess I’d like to but it really turns me off hearing what guys have to say. At least with a celebrity or a dead person I can create my own idea of them, and that’s what is so appealing.
All art by Kat Storm.
Kaitlyn is a 21-year-old artist from Vancouver Island, Canada. She is shy and passionate. Her interests include, The Doors, Jim Morrison, pastel, Dolores Haze, daisies, Bugs Bunny, Family Guy, Archie, and Meadham Kirchhoff.